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How to motivate my boyfriend to study? 8 simple tips

Are you a type of girl who wants to see your boyfriend become a successful man. Well, I appreciate you. So let’s dive into the topic to understand the way you can motivate your boyfriend to study with the top 8 Tips that work quickly.

Table of Contents

1) Tell him about his future responsibilities

When you call with him, tell him about his future responsibilities.

• Tell him that he has to look after his family in the future.
• He has to buy a house
• A car (if necessary )
• Expenses for groceries
• Electricity bills and water bills
• Healthcare expenses
• When it has children school fee
•  Entertainment and much more
• For all of the above things, understand your boyfriend about the importance of studying.

2) Tell him about the meeting with your parents.

Tell him that he has to meet your parents when the right time has come. Then tell him at that time he has to be some solid-state.

3) Make dreams and give targets to him to motivate your boyfriend

When you call your boyfriend, talk with him about your future dreams as a family. Discuss with him what are the places both of you are going on vacations.

Tell him that you like to see him become a boss. And I think your boyfriend will understand that you are not a gold digger. (if you have a powerful relationship) tell him about such kind of dreams.

Then understand him that he should be a good state after some years later. Tell him you need to become an important person to society. Realize him that you don’t like to see him plea to anyone.

So tell him to perform an average of 50 marks for this exam. Then the next exam increases it into 60. after that, gradually increase it. So give that kind of target to him.

4) Teach him hard lessons

If you take care of him, you can identify his weak subjects. Then teach him those things. So you can motivate my boyfriend to study in this way.

If your boyfriend is not like to study, he probably doesn’t want to read books. So make  reading books as his favorite habit . Do you know a girl can make his boyfriend a perfect man? so start to do it right now.

5) Keep certain times to call or text with him.

So you are thinking, “how to motivate my boyfriend to study.” Then if you are calling him every time you are a big reason for his weakness.

Discuss among both of you and understand the perfect times both of you can,

• You can call when feeling sleepy
• When going by bus
• Both of you can agree to call before 30 minutes of sleep. So then what happened? Assume you are sleeping at 11 P.M. you can call him at 10.30 P.M. you both can agree to study until that time. Then anyone will not sleep early. And get used to waking up early morning and study. But be careful not to take any  distraction  while you are studying. So you can call early morning too to  avoid sleep while studying .

6) Teach him a proper time table   to motivate your boyfriend

I know you are in the mission, which is the way to motivate your boyfriend to study. So why not you make a proper timetable for him? Then give it to him and push him to work with it.

7) Ask questions from him.

This is a handy method you will love. Suddenly get a call and ask him that you can’t understand a part of a particular subject. Even you know it, ask it. But don’t tell him that you know it.

“don’t know,”

then tell him,

“Please, can you read and understand it and teach it to me. Because I can’t understand it”.

Then what happened is he will learn it, and he will teach you. So try this kind of little tricks. With time you will see a good improvement with him.

8) Admire him   to motivate your boyfriend

Time will pass very quickly. With time he will get good improvement. And then tell him that you are delighted with it. And admire him. Then he will get more motivated, and he will become a good man to society and an excellent partner to your life.

Have a beautiful future.

If you are the kind of girlfriend who wishes the success of your boyfriend, then you are right place. If you want to motivate your boyfriend to study, I have discussed through this article 8 successful tips to do it that work quickly.

What is your favorite you are going to try most? Tell me in the comment section.

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How to Date Your Boyfriend and Still Do Well in School

Last Updated: May 3, 2021 Approved

This article was co-authored by wikiHow Staff . Our trained team of editors and researchers validate articles for accuracy and comprehensiveness. wikiHow's Content Management Team carefully monitors the work from our editorial staff to ensure that each article is backed by trusted research and meets our high quality standards. There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. In this case, 90% of readers who voted found the article helpful, earning it our reader-approved status. This article has been viewed 99,446 times. Learn more...

Having a partner in school can sometimes distract you from your schoolwork. It is important to let your boyfriend know that while you like hanging out with him, you need some time to study. If you want, you can even study with your boyfriend, so long as you set boundaries for your study sessions. Balancing your romantic life with your school does not need to be difficult, as long as your boyfriend knows what to expect.

Setting Your Priorities

• You can say, “I really want to hang out with you, but I have to make sure that my grades stay up. I won't be able to hang out every night of the week, but we can still have fun together.”
• It might help to be specific with your boyfriend upfront. For example, at the beginning of the week, say something like, “I have a biology test on Thursday and an English paper due on Friday. I'm going to have to work all week on this.”

• When he is stressed, let him know that you are there for him. Instead of trying to solve his problems, gently comfort him instead. [3] X Research source
• You can suggest, “Hey, maybe once you take your test, we can go see a football game together.” This will give him something to look forward to so that he does not burn out on studying.
• If he struggling with his own grades, offer to help him study. Do not do his homework for him, and don't give him the answers. You can, however, quiz him or proofread his essays.

• You can say, “If I want to get into college, I have to make good grades” or “If my grades start to slip, my parents won't let me date.”
• If he tries to tell you something like “If you loved me, you'd hang out with me more,” turn it around on him. Say, “If you loved me, you'd want me to do well in school.” If a boy starts using guilt tactics like this, he is trying to manipulate you. This is usually a red flag.

• You can say, “I have a history test on Monday. I think I need to study over the weekend. Can we move our movie night to next weekend?”

Studying With Your Boyfriend

• It can be easy to become distracted during study dates. At the beginning, set a time limit or a boundary with your boyfriend. Say, “I need to study for at least two hours before I can do anything else” or “If I write three pages, maybe we can watch an episode of a TV show together.”

• If your boyfriend knows you are studying and still texts you constantly, it could signal a lack of trust on his part. This is especially true if he keeps asking where you are or demands that you pay attention to him. [4] X Research source Have a talk with your boyfriend. You can say, “It's not cool that you keep texting me when I ask you not to. Trust is important in a relationship, and if you can't trust me, this might not work out.”

• Remember your boyfriend does not have to take up your whole life. You can still study and be a good girlfriend. In fact, a good boyfriend is one who understands that you need to work and gives you the time you need to succeed. [5] X Research source
• If your boyfriend becomes angry that you are setting boundaries, it is not your fault. It is his problem. [6] X Research source This is typical of abusive behavior. Even if he is not currently abusive to you, it is a sign that he may be trying to control you.

Balancing Your School and Social Life

• You can also follow the 48 hour rule. If your boyfriend angers you, wait two days. If you're still angry, you can bring it up with him. Otherwise, it might be a minor issue, and you can drop it. [9] X Research source

Expert Q&A

• Don't break dates off at the last minute without a good reason. Thanks Helpful 3 Not Helpful 1
• Don't procrastinate and wait until the last minute to study or exams or for essays. Thanks Helpful 3 Not Helpful 2
• Be nice. He is your boyfriend after all. He will be more understanding if you're gentle and clear about the subject. Thanks Helpful 6 Not Helpful 0

• Do not blame your boyfriend for slipping grades. While you may need to focus more on schoolwork, you should not accuse him of being the problem. Thanks Helpful 30 Not Helpful 3
• Don't put too much focus on schoolwork. If you find yourself constantly working it's okay to take a few days off to spend time on other things. Thanks Helpful 21 Not Helpful 6
• If your boyfriend cannot respect your boundaries, he probably does not respect you. You may want to consider breaking up with him. Thanks Helpful 25 Not Helpful 8

You Might Also Like

• ↑ http://www.loveisrespect.org/healthy-relationships/communicate-better/
• ↑ http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/psp-a0033769.pdf
• ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/how-couples-can-help-each-other-de-stress-and-improve-their-relationship/
• ↑ http://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/texting-sexting/
• ↑ http://www.loveisrespect.org/healthy-relationships/setting-boundaries/
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/prescriptions-life/201304/if-you-set-boundary-expect-deal-anger
• ↑ http://www.apa.org/science/about/psa/2011/02/life-balance.aspx
• ↑ http://learningpath.org/articles/Top_10_Tips_for_High_School_Dating.html

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hey so, my bf and I go to school together and we have 2 classes together. It really bugs me because I'm really serious about school like I'm always studyingand trying to get really good grades, but my bf on the other hand would rather play video games all day than study. He does his homework cuz he has to but it just stupid that I don't have anyone to study with and he never does any of the readings. I find myself being kinda naggy and that's not what I want at all but it's really hard to ignore. What should I do? Everytime I say something about him not doing anything for school he get all defensive with an attitude, and I know if someone really doesn't want to do something there's nothing you can do, but if I don't say anything it eats me up! It frustrates me so much, but it's his education not mine. Does anyone have any ideas? Thanks!!

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How to Motivate a Teenage Boy to Work Harder in School

Jennifer dermody.

It may seem impossible to motivate a teenage boy enough to get him out of bed, never mind to actually do something productive. Naturally, teenage boys sleep more, eat more and want to be with their friends more than they do with you; it's that milestone in their development called "adolescence." However, with the right combination of persuasion, encouragement and even rewards, his energy might surprise you. Motivate your teenage boy by helping him realize the positives that come with working harder in school.

Ask your teenage boy about his feelings regarding study habits and motivation toward school work. Consider his thoughts in your approach to a plan so that he feels as if his input is important.

Tell your teenage boy that you love him no matter what. Explain that you are not trying to control him by encouraging more motivation; instead, you are helping him keep the doors to opportunity open. Explain specifically that if he gets better grades, a basketball scholarship might be more likely, or that an "A" in automotive class may lead to a job at his uncle's body shop.

Talk with his teachers and other parents to find out how much time your teenager should reasonably spend working on his homework each night. Compare the expected amount of time with the actual amount of time his current schedule permits, and make changes where necessary.

Set him up for success by letting him help create a comfortable space for homework. Add a radio or an mp3 player if he feels that music helps him concentrate. Buy special homework snacks. Keep the necessary school supplies on hand at home.

Use a calendar to show him when the terms and semesters end. Mark off vacations and teacher workshop days. Seeing the days and weeks on a calendar helps your teenage boy with time management, a skill that is learned.

Expect progress to be slow. Offer praise for small accomplishments such as doing homework consistently for one week. Notice when test scores improve by as little as five points.

Leave notes of encouragement when you sense they are needed. Candy accompanied by a short handwritten note can bring a smile, even to a teenage boy.

Reward significant accomplishments with money, a curfew extension or an outing. Show him that a pattern of hard work and motivation leads to rewards.

Join in the journey instead of being a bystander. Teenage boys benefit from direction and support. After you have established a plan that seems to work, stick with it. Keep him on track with gentle reminders, praise and support.

• Keep in close contact with teachers via email or telephone so that you can address immediately any problems that might arise with missing work or failed tests.
• 1 Family Education Network: Under Achieving Teens
• 2 Positive Discipline: How Do You Motivate a Teen: Jane Nelson

About the Author

Jennifer Dermody started writing in 1992. She has been published in "Running Wild Magazine," "The Green Book" environmental bid journal and local publications in the areas that she has lived all over the world. She is currently a licensed Florida real estate agent. Dermody earned her Bachelor of Arts degree in communications from Regis College in 1993.

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Dear christine: how do i motivate my teen, bossing them around won't work forever; we need to help teens manage their own lives., dear christine,.

I have two teenagers, a boy who is in high school and a girl who is in college. My daughter has always been self-motivated and a great student. I’ve never needed to nag her to do her homework, and she has always gotten good grades and great teacher comments.

My son is another story. His study skills are lacking. He doesn’t like school, and he doesn’t work very hard. I have to constantly be “on him” about his school work. We’ve had him tested for learning disabilities and ADHD, and he does not have either, although the tests showed that he does have great difficulty paying attention to things that he is not interested in.

He’s now a sophomore. Still, I’m constantly “helping” him with his homework, figuring out what work he has due, what tests he has coming up, or what assignments he might have failed to turn in. I’m afraid he won’t do it otherwise.

Our son says he does not want me to back off and that he wants me to continue helping him. At the same time, he is not exactly welcoming of my help in the moment. He’s often a little surly when I remind him of assignments, and he usually makes excuses for why he doesn’t have to work on something. He lacks self-motivation, and without me pushing him (and keeping him organized), I fear (1) that he might actually get worse grades; (2) that he won’t get a college degree; and (3) that this will limit his job prospects. Ultimately, I’m afraid that he’s going to end up living at home into his early adulthood, stuck on the couch playing video games.

I can’t help wishing that our son was more like our daughter. I want him to be more independent and self-motivated. Above all, I want him to do well enough in high school to go to a decent college. What do you recommend I do? If I’m honest, I’m looking for permission to keep propping our son up.

Thanks, Parental Crutch

Dear Crutch,

In some ways, you are right to be worried: About a quarter of young men in the United States in their 20s are unemployed. That statistic is mind-blowing to the economists who track these things, given that men in their 20s have historically been the most reliably employed of any demographic. While the trend toward unemployment encompasses young men of all education levels , low-skilled men—like those without a college degree or training in a trade—are particularly likely to end up living back at home. A staggering 51 percent now live with their parents or another close relative. And what are they doing instead of working? (Hint: They aren’t going to school.) You’ve already guessed it; many of them are playing video games three or more hours a day.

So, it’s good that you have college and work aspirations for your son. But I’m afraid that your current efforts on his behalf aren’t going to pay off. Unfortunately, trying to control our children is frequently futile and usually counterproductive.

That’s the clear conclusion psychologist Wendy Grolnick has reached over two decades of watching parents talk to their children. Here’s the gist of her research : The children of controlling parents—those who tell their children exactly what to do, and when to do it—don’t do as well as kids whose parents are involved and supportive without being bossy. Children of “directive” parents tend to be less creative and resourceful, less persistent when faced with a challenge, less successful at solving problems. They don’t like school as much, and they don’t achieve as much academically.

And what’s true for children in terms of parental control is about a thousand times more true about teenagers. Once kids reach adolescence, they need to start managing their own lives, and they know this. Most kids with micromanaging parents resist what their parents want for them every chance they get. They do this not because they are lazy or short-sighted, but because they need to regain a sense of control.

This cannot be overstated: Healthy, self-disciplined, motivated teenagers have a strong sense of control over their lives. A mountain of research demonstrates that agency—having the power to affect your own life—is one of the most important factors for both success and happiness. Believing that we can influence our own lives through our own efforts predicts practically all of the positive outcomes that we want for our teens: better health and longevity, lower use of drugs and alcohol, lower stress, higher emotional well-being, greater intrinsic motivation and self-discipline, improved academic performance, and even career success.

You have an important choice, Crutch.

Choice A: Keep riding your son; keep him organized and on track. He’ll likely get a lot more homework turned in, he’ll study for tests he would have avoided or forgotten about, and he’ll apply to the colleges you put in front of him. The big question in my mind, though, is about what will happen when he’s off at college and he doesn’t have you there by his side to keep him on track.

Actually, in my mind, it’s not that big of a question.

The odds are he won’t make it . An astounding 56 percent of students who start at a four-year college drop out before they’ve earned a degree. Nearly a third drop out after just the first year. If your son doesn’t develop the study skills he needs to succeed (without you), he is not likely to develop them once he gets to college.

Which brings us to Choice B: Back off so that your son can build the skills he’ll need to survive without you. This does mean risking letting your son stumble, but at least he’ll be at home with you when he does.

More on Raising Happy Teens

If you like this post, I think you’ll love my new book, The New Adolescence: Raising Happy and Successful Teens in an Age of Anxiety and Distraction . If you’re in the Bay Area, we hope you’ll join us for the launch at the Hillside Club on February 20, 20! Find more information about Christine Carter’s book events here .

Your son, of course, will not want you to back off. Why would he want to put in that kind of effort if you’ll do it for him? Plus, there is no risk for him right now; he can’t really fail if he doesn’t really try.

I’m not saying disengage from his life. It’s important for you to stay involved and supportive, but to do so without being directive or controlling. Set limits so that he knows you aren’t lowering your expectations. For example, if you expect him to maintain a B average, that’s great. What happens if he doesn’t do that? Decide as a family, and then be firm and consistent in enforcing your limits.

In fact, don’t dial back your effort at all, just shift your focus . Right now, you are propping your son up. Instead of putting all your energy into doing things that your son would be better off doing for himself, put your effort into supporting his self-motivation.

As I explained not long ago to another mom who was overhelping her husband , the way to foster self-motivation in others is to support their autonomy, their competence, and their relatedness. These are the three core psychological needs that, when filled, lead to self-motivation. You can choose to refocus your attention on promoting his self-motivation. Here’s how.

1. Give him more freedom. He needs the freedom to fail on his own—and the freedom to succeed without having to give you credit . Your son can’t feel autonomous in his schoolwork if you are still the organizing force.

Instead of directing your son, ask him: “What’s your plan?” As in, “What’s your plan for getting your homework done this weekend?” Asking kids what their plan is makes it clear that they are still in control of their own behavior, and it helps put them in touch with their own motivations and intentions. Often kids simply need to make a plan—and sometimes if they aren’t asked to articulate their plan, they won’t make one. (Especially kids who are used to being nagged; those kids know that their parents will eventually get frustrated and do their planning for them.)

This not-making-a-plan thing is developmental, by the way—it is often more about their executive function than their motivation. Our frontal lobe, which enables us to make plans for the future, often doesn’t develop fully until our mid 20s. This doesn’t mean that teenagers can’t plan, or that we should do it for them; it just means that they need a little more support practicing planning than might be obvious given their other capabilities.

It’s also really important that we parents pay close attention to our tone of voice, especially if what we are saying could potentially limit our kids’ freedom in some way—if we are making a request that could be interpreted as pressure. Research suggests that moms who talk to their teens in a “controlling tone of voice” don’t tend to get a positive response, and they are more likely to start an argument.

It’s not enough to just stay neutral, unfortunately; although a neutral tone of voice is less likely to make teens defensive and argumentative, it was found to be equally in effective in motivating kids.

What did work? The teens who were the most likely to carry out the request being made had parents who used a “supportive” and encouraging tone of voice.

2. Help him feel more competent. If I were a betting woman, I’d bet that your son feels incompetent compared to his superstar sister. This likely leads to resignation. Why should he try if he’ll never be as good as her, anyway?

Help him see where he’s done really well in the past through his own effort (rather than your nagging). Don’t be afraid to ask him: Where do you feel most confident? And then help him see that it is his own effort that has led to that capability.

Christine Carter on The New Adolescence

The launch of a new book about raising happy and successful teens in an age of anxiety and distraction.

You can also support him in building new competencies. It sounds like he needs to build better study skills, for example. Who would be a good study skills coach for him? It’s important for him to develop his ability to learn and push himself outside of his comfort zone.

2. Finally, support his sense of belonging and connectedness with others , particularly at school. Is there a teacher whom he feels connected to who can encourage him? Or a coach who is also willing to talk to him about his life as a student? Or a peer group who would encourage him to pay more attention to school work? Sometimes the best way we can help our kids is to help them find a community where they can thrive. One way to do this is to enlist the interest and attention of another adult.

Crutch, I’m very clear about this: The time to take the training wheels off is now . When he falls, let him pick himself up and try again. This will build autonomy and competence. You can celebrate his successes—this will build relatedness. Let him learn how to ask for the help he needs; when he gets it, it will expand his sense of belonging and connection to others.

Redirecting your energy towards promoting your son’s self -motivation will not likely be in your comfort zone. But once you get the hang of not nagging and not being so directive, your relationship with your son is sure to be far more rewarding—for you both.

Yours, Christine

About the Author

Christine Carter

Christine Carter, Ph.D. is a Senior Fellow at the Greater Good Science Center. She is the author of The New Adolescence: Raising Happy and Successful Teens in an Age of Anxiety and Distraction (BenBella, 2020), The Sweet Spot: How to Accomplish More by Doing Less (Ballantine Books, 2015), and Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents (Random House, 2010). A former director of the GGSC, she served for many years as author of its parenting blog, Raising Happiness . Find out more about Christine here .

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Q: How Can I Counteract My Son’s Apathy and Inspire His Motivation?

How can i motivate a very bright teenager who seems incapable of getting started on tasks or projects that aren’t personally interesting here, our dear teen parenting coach explains how to spark motivation in the teen adhd brain, how boosting your teen’s confidence in some areas transfers to others, and how to keep momentum going all the way to completion..

Q : “Hello, I am the mother of a very bright teen with ADHD who has NO motivation at all… and who says to me, ‘I have no idea how to get motivated when it is things I am not interested in.’ I have not found any strategies that help and my husband and many teachers think he is just “lazy.” I do not want to make excuses for him; I want to help him help himself and I don’t know how.” —YoYo Mom

Dear YoYo Mom:

You pose a thorny (and common) question: How can you encourage (or force) a teen with attention deficit disorder ( ADHD or ADD ) to learn things that don’t interest him? If you took a poll, I imagine at least one-third of students in  every  class in  every  high school in the country would tell you they could not care less about the subject being taught. Part of going to school is learning how to learn and do things that do not interest you. As Plato said, “Education is teaching children to desire the right things.”

Your situation is even more challenging because your longer full question suggests that your son is less invested in social relationships than are most teens. This trait will not deny him a satisfying life. However, he is not particularly motivated by pleasing others. Winning the approval of you or his teachers may not be enough to push your son over the hump of boredom and indifference.

This predicament is not of his own choosing. In addition to the aforementioned hurdles, your son is butting heads with what our society deems a  proper education.  According to Harvard psychologist Howard Gardner, individual and societal success requires children to absorb the knowledge and skills that society deems necessary. As the child grows more independent, we hope he will integrate this body of truths and facts into his own goals and direction. Right now, however, your son realizes you can no longer force him to do his work, and he has an internal lack of motivation for what’s offered in school, so he is having trouble connecting that to his future.

[ Free Resource: Transform Your Teen’s Apathy Into Engagement ]

What to do? First, no matter how frustrated you might feel, don’t call him any four-letter words. That includes “lazy.” When you call a teen ‘lazy’ he feels hurt, unjustly criticized, and misunderstood. Of course, as a parent you have every right to feel frustrated, worried, and perplexed. But instead of motivating your son, criticism may backfire and cause him to shut down even more.

Second, be grateful he gave you the honest answer: “I have no idea how to get motivated when it is things I am not interested in.” This is a great opportunity to ask him how he envisions his future, keeping in mind that he may not even be able to imagine a future for himself. But your questions can help.

“If school does not interest you, what does?”

“Are there things you feel you are good at that are not taught or measured in school?”

[ Why Teens Stop Trying ]

“Can you see doing some of these things when you are older?”

“Have you ever thought of how you want your future to look? Where you want to live, what kind of job you might want? Family?”

Don’t worry if his answers are vague; you are getting him to start thinking. You can then begin to talk about the path he might walk to get there. Remain open-minded. There are many avenues to success in adulthood, and very few of them are straightforward,

Use these conversations to draw connections between his school work and what he actually wants to know. The author Daniel Pink has pointed out that relevance is as important to learning as are the other three Rs, however schools do not always draw the link between a teen’s curriculum and his life. If you ask more about what he is learning, you may be able to make that leap.

Third, your son may need help structuring his time better. This is done by setting some reasonable expectations for his grades. Then limiting the things he does beyond homework. Parents are often loath to cut off their kids from their phones or the Internet. In reality, there are ways to shut off his computer’s Internet access only until his grades improve.

[ How to Motivate a Teenager with ADHD ]

Finally, I have found that the thing holding back many kids from applying themselves in school is anxiety. They are under so much pressure to get into a “good college” that every homework assignment feels like it will decide their future. Underperforming students can also worry what will happen if they start trying and don’t succeed. So they do what we all do when something makes us anxious: They avoid it.

Talk to your son about the pressure he is under. Ask if he is worried that, if he applies himself and does not succeed, it will be prove he is not smart. Then try this: As he does his homework, have him log all of the anxious thoughts that run through his brain (“I will fail” “This is too hard” “How will I do something so boring.”) Review the log with him to see what patterns emerge. Use the log, also, like a bug zapper — to attract his noxious thoughts and to kill them.

Here is one last thought: make sure he is engaged in some after-school activities. It does not matter what he does, but the more he is engaged after school, the greater the chance he will be engaged in school. More importantly, you may find that these extracurricular activities are what give him enjoyment, help him develop important skills, and allow him to think about a future that he desires.

Do you have a question for ADDitude’s Dear Teen Parenting Coach? Submit your question or challenge here.

The opinions and suggestions presented above are intended for your general knowledge only and are not a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment for specific medical conditions. You should not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease without consulting with a qualified healthcare provider. Please consult your healthcare provider with any questions or concerns you may have regarding your own or your child’s condition.

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How To Keep Your Child Motivated When Studying: 11 Tips For Parents

As children get older, more responsibility is placed on them to doing their homework and stay on top of their assignments. While some students have the motivation to complete their homework on time, other students struggle to get started and need help with homework.

Although it’s important for parents to take an active role in ensuring their child completes homework, it’s also important to not force your child to do it—there’s a big difference between forcing and motivating.

Encouraging your child to find motivation in a positive way is important for building habits that last. Forcing your child to do work can make them resent homework time, making self-motivation much more difficult to achieve.

So what can you do when your child has no motivation to study? Check out these tips to help your child find the drive to get homework done.

How To Stay Motivated For Homework

1. find out what’s stopping your child from doing their homework.

Your child may be unmotivated to study for a number of reasons. Finding the root of the problem will help with homework and help you and your child develop a plan to overcome the barriers that are preventing him or her from doing their homework.

Some reasons for lack of motivation may be:

• Poor understanding of the material
• Work that isn’t challenging enough
• Work that isn’t suited to his or her learning style
• Anxiety about school
• Low self-confidence

2. Make Homework Time Easier

Make study time as easy as possible for your child by providing him or her with everything needed to get work done:

• Quiet space: Find a quiet, distraction-free space for your child to study.
• Food and drink: If your child is hungry, it can be hard to focus on work. Give your child a light snack before a study session and plenty of water to ensure he or she can remain focused.
• The right tools: Make sure pencils, an eraser, a calculator, and other important tools are easily accessible so time isn’t wasted trying to find them.

Making sure your child has everything he or she needs means less resistance and fewer excuses.

3. Create A Homework Help Plan Together

Children do well with structure—having a solid study plan in place will help keep your child on track. Sit down with your child and create a plan for doing their homework each night. Including your child in the process will help keep him or her engaged (and more willing to adhere to the plan!)

Your plan should include:

• When homework is to be done each day
• How much time should be spent on doing their homework
• How often to take breaks and for how long
• What tasks should be prioritized (i.e. assignments that are due the soonest)

4. Create A Reward System

Build a reward system with your child so he or she has something to look forward to once study time is complete—the key to staying motivated when studying. The rewards can be as simple as watching TV once homework is done or collecting ‘points’ after each study session to use for something special.

5. Limiting Stress Will Help with Homework

If your child is stressed, he or she might find it difficult to study, or even find the motivation to get started in the first place. Help your child relieve stress by spending time with him or her and encouraging conversations about thoughts and feelings.

Make sure your child has enough time each evening to de-stress. Discuss activities to do during study breaks or after doing their homework is complete that can help lower stress, such as:

• Going for a walk
• Listening to music

6. Focus On Learning Instead Of Performance

Instead of focusing primarily on grades, celebrate milestones related to learning—both big and small.

This might be when your child successfully solves a tricky math problem, or when he or she finishes writing the first draft of an essay. When switching the focus to learning, your child can find more enjoyment in accomplishing work, helping boost motivation.

7. Encourage Your Child To Set Small Goals

Encourage your child to set small, achievable study goals based on what needs to be accomplished. Setting goals gives your child clear directions for what needs to be done, and boosts confidence when he or she accomplishes these goals.

Some examples of studying goals include:

• Read one chapter of the assigned reading
• Review notes for twenty minutes
• Complete 5 practice questions from the textbook

8. Try Different Techniques

There isn’t a ‘one size fits all’ solution for studying—every student has a slightly different way of learning. If your child is studying with a method that doesn’t match his or her learning style, he or she might get frustrated because grasping the material becomes much more difficult. Try different studying techniques to see what works best for your child.

9. Take Proper Study Breaks

Although it can be tempting to try to get your child to doing their homework done in one go, the brain can lose focus without breaks (especially for younger students). Dividing study time into manageable chunks is important for keeping your child’s mind fresh and engaged. Encourage your child to take proper study breaks during a study session. Keep these tips in mind for a productive study break:

• Use a timer to remind your child when it’s time to take a break
• Take breaks after about 30 minutes of work
• Keep breaks between 5-10 minutes long

10. Encourage Exercise

Pent-up energy leads to frustration and makes studying even more difficult. Regular exercise improves overall well-being and reduces stress, making it’s easier for doing their homework.

Make sure your child is getting plenty of physical activity each day before studying. Even a quick walk around the block during a study break is a great way to allow your child to get blood flowing to the brain and helps avoid frustration and burnout.

11. Provide Help With Homework For Your Child

Keep open communication with your child, and offer support when needed. This might include making arrangements to talk with your child’s teacher, getting your child some extra help , or just lending an ear when your child is feeling overwhelmed. Knowing that support is available will help your child develop the confidence to tackle any problems that might arise.

See how you can motivate your child to do their homework.

Help Your Child Get Help With Homework

Avoid the dreaded homework battle and use the tips above to help your child develop good study habits. While as a parent it’s important to make sure your child’s doing their homework, it’s important to not force your child to do it. Instead, focus on making study time a positive experience so your child can build self-motivation to get it completed on time.

If your child is struggling in a certain area or getting stuck on a certain subject, Oxford Learning is here to help! Contact us today to find out how we can help your child achieve success in school and beyond.

For more help with motivation and focus, check out these other resources: How To Study At Home (Without Getting Distracted) 5 Factors That Impact Your Child’s Focus (& How To Recognize Them)

How To Be A More Productive Student: 8 Tips & Things To Avoid

11 tips for helping your child manage a lot of homework, related homework resources.

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7 ways to help slow-working students, find an oxford learning ® location near you, we have over 100 centres across canada.